Dear diary, I'm still waiting to get my draft body paragraph revision back, but because I emailed it and am to poor for INsite I fear its lost in the infinite messages my teacher gets. Anyways back to the important stuff, recently in English we went over a poem based on Filipino history it was a poem by Kevin Nadals called "Ikaw", it triggered immense feelings from me I felt angry and as if I was being told a bit of my story through his poem.
Twenty years ago
you told me that life was better.
Better than they used to be.
But then you called me a dogeater.
Monkey.
Oriental.
Nigger.
Chink.
Flip.
Fob.
You told me my skin was dirty I'd never be like you.
You told that I was ugly because I didnt look like you.
Kevin Nadal incites his anger and the past discrimination he and other Filipinos had to deal with living in America as the subordinate race. The fact that his skin color was different and the stereotypes behind the Filipino race brought many insults like the term dogeater, which he mentions including all the insults he and every Filipino has ever been called, he states it.
Reading these lines brought me back to my earlier child years. I remember clearly the insults and the discrimination I went through growing up. As a kid I didn't even know what a chink was I remember I couldn't even respond back the first time I even got called a chink, I just knew it was something negative from the tone of the other kids voice, I was probably only 7 at the time during my baseball years when it first happened. Reflecting back on the past as a child I didn't even know what race I affiliated with yet; I just knew I was different and was already getting ridiculed for my ethical backround, but today I can say I'm proud to be Filipino regardless of the discrimination I faced in the past.
Oriental.
Hello Aaron.
ReplyDeleteThe irony! You were playing the quintessential American game, baseball, and you were singled out for not fitting the norm. You experience reminds me of so many other stories people have told about being singled out and called names. They weren't sure what the word meant, but they had a sense from the body language and tone that there was something inherently wrong with them.
I'm interested how reading about identity development might shed light on your experiences - how it might make it fit a pattern that many people who don't fit the "mythical norm" experience.
Hi Aaron!
ReplyDeleteI've had the conversation a few times with my mom about how things have changed since she was in school. Sometimes I'm really amazed at how people treat each other now, so I can't really imagine things being worse...even though I know that they were.
It's interesting also that as adults, we can look back at words that we heard growing up and attach meanings that we may not have known at the time.
Anyway...good to see you blogging :)
Best,
Laura
sup man, sorry for the past childhood can be BS. trust me i know because of being Mexican/American and living in Tj with a single White mother... but hey just like Nadal and I, i hope you can turn that anger into motivation and "Stick it to the man" hahaha as my grandmother always said "kill them with kindness" good luck man i enjoyed reading your blog i didnt even know that Chink was an insult nether.
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